I'm not sure if it's professional to let it out and say, I'm not happy with my job. I'm okay with it, yes. But only because it pays the rent, takes care of the bills, takes me to places I haven't been to and gives me just enough to still help out my parents and my siblings who are still in school. I've been a little depressed at how I'm unable to figure things out. When I was younger, I always thought that when I approach 25, I'd already have a car and maybe a small condo unit, and you know, just live by as if life were that easy. Apparently, it's not. 

I am approaching 25, and what have I accomplished so far? I have managed to give money to my siblings whenever they need it. Treat my parents every now and then, help out with the expenses at home and that's it. I don't have any investment, and aside from my gadgets, I don't own anything at all. I'd like to say I have lived a frugal life for the past 5 years. I haven't shopped as much as I used to in college, if I have any guilty indulgence, that would be food--which is a necessity. But where did I go wrong? How come my ideal life isn't even close to my reality? It's really disheartening to look at what 5 years of work has done to me. I've been feeling this way for several months now and I can't seem to shrug this feeling away. Cooking is the only thing that keeps my mind off things.

Aaaaand, since this post is becoming lengthy and melodramatic, I'll stop. 

Woke up early today because the boyfriend kept on trying to ruin my sleep. We both have fucked up body clocks and unfortunately, they weren't in sync yesterday. Hence all the bullying while I was sleeping and he was wide awake. Couldn't go back to sleep so I made breakfast! We had Enoki mushrooms wrapped in bacon, scrambled eggs with basil, onions and tomatoes, broccoli salad and coconut juice!

Work this week was extra toxic and extremely difficult. Two months before my birthday and this lingering feeling of unhappiness haunts me every time. I know, I know. You'll tell me this happens every year, months before my birthday. I know that, too! But I can't seem to get rid of this annoying and unpleasant feeling. I just had a haircut, hoping I'm one step closer to finally letting go--of that dreaded feeling, amongst other things.